Pregnancy Style

Being nearly 7 months pregnant with my first child, I've had an interesting time navigating through maternity clothes. Starting right off the bat at 9 weeks, I was so bloated and I figured why be miserable? I went and purchased some maternity work pants and jeans. That was a good decision, one I highly recommend! I've had trouble fitting into maternity tops as they are still all too big for me. I settled on buying regular clothes at my favorite clothing stores in a size or two larger than I'd normally wear and it seems regular stores still carry much cuter stuff than the maternity stores. I swapped my normal high heels for lower heels or flats and thankfully flats are fairly in right now. I figured I'd share some of my favorite outfits right now as I know it can be super hard to feel cute or stylish when pregnant.

I love this look with a colored or gray dress/tunic style top, dark leggings, dark boots and dark jacket. The nice thing about this outfit is you can wear it during any trimester and when you feel fat before your bump protrudes as it hides the fat feeling pretty well (I say fat feeling because I definitely felt like I looked fat from eating too many donuts not from a bun in the oven). The jacket could easily be swapped for a sweater and the boots for flats for warmer weather.

Okay, so I know this isn't a pregnant picture but what I love about this outfit is that the brightly colored skinny's allow for a more neutral top and I've been definitely taking advantage of that neutral top. From a basic black top with black boots, flats or heels or a white top and neutral or animal print flats. I find I wear a lot of dark colors on top to minimize the knockers that have grown tremendously during pregnancy and the color on the bottom adds a nice pop!

I love this look as well: skinny jeans, tank, flats and jacket. I'm big on using colors in accessories so I'd probably add some fun color or print with the flats, scarf or purse. Lastly, here is my list of what I think every pregnant woman should have in her closet:

- Basic black and white tank top (1 of each is probably sufficient and doesn't necessarily have to be maternity so long as they are stretchy and long enough)

- Maternity leggings (2-3 is probably enough and standard colors such as black, gray, etc. plus maybe some fun prints or colors)

- Comfortable pair of flats and get a size with room to grow

- Sweaters or jackets (light or thick depending on the season and you'll definitely want a good selection of these)

There are many ways to style the bump and I just listed a few suggestions of what I've found work for me. Have fun with colors and if you're shy with color, accessorize with it. With those basics, you can easily swap them out and trade outfits to keep it fresh without spending a lot of money on maternity clothes.

What Do Newborns Really Look Like?

Before having a child of my own, when picturing my future baby, I always imagined a rosy cheeked little cherub child. But anyone who has been around a newborn knows that most babies are not born that way. We all know they tend to look "scrunchy," swollen, and pink… but there are many other features that are common in new babies- some of which may be surprising to new parents!

Cone/Large Head: Newborn skull bones are soft and aren't fused together yet in order to accommodate birth and the growing brain. Cone heads are common and are usually caused when the baby is stuck in the birth canal for too long. Luckily, the head will usually round back out again after a few days. All babies' heads are large in comparison to their bodies because their brains are much further developed than their bodies at birth.

Body Hair: Some babies are born with fine hair all over their body called Lanugo. This hair forms in the womb to keep babies warm before they are fully developed and usually disappears before birth. For this reason, lanugo hair is usually found on premature babies. It will disappear within a few days or weeks.

Disfigured Body/Belly: The legs and arms of a newborn are not surprisingly, usually bent and bowed from spending all that time in the womb. They will stretch out soon enough. A baby belly will usually resemble a bloated frog, then will become more Buddha-shaped after a few months.

White Substance on Skin: Many babies will be born with Vernix Caseosa, a white, cheesy/waxy substance on their skin. This is perfectly healthy and can simply be wiped off or rubbed into the baby's skin as a moisturizer.

Soft Spots: All babies have two soft spots on their heads, called Fontanels, located on top of the head at the front, and one in the back under the crown. These are the places where the skull bones aren't yet fused together in order to allow for birth and for the brain to continue growing. They are okay to touch gently, and they will typically stay around for the first year or two of life.

Discolored/Splotchy Skin: Most babies are born a purplish/red color, then will turn pinker over a few hours. Some babies will develop jaundice and as a result will take on a yellow skin tone. Some may have red patches above the hairline at the back of the neck, on the eyelids or between the eyes. These may fade with time or become less noticeable. Dark-skinned babies are often born with a large gray mark on the bottom or lower back called Dermal Melanosis, which also goes away after a few weeks or months. Little white spots may be found on the face or other areas of the body called Milia. These, too, will usually fade with time.

Swollen Face/Genitalia: At birth, newborn bodies are full of hormones from their mothers and fluids from the womb. A result of this are swollen body parts, including the eyes, nose, nipples and genitalia.

Baby Girl "Period": Strange as it sounds, baby girls may have a mini "period" after birth or some vaginal discharge. This is the result of the baby flushing out mother's hormones and is nothing to be concerned about.

Smelly Umbilical Cord: The umbilical cord will usually fall off within the first two weeks, but before it does, it might start to take on a strange smell. Nothing needs to be done with it- it will fall off soon!

Eye Color: A baby's eye color is never certain right after birth. Many are born with blue or gray eyes that change after a few months; others acquire their true color right away. They could take years to reveal their true form (but as we all know, eyes can even change in adulthood!) But by 6-9 months of age, a baby's eyes will probably remain the way they are.

Baby Acne: These small red bumps appear after a couple of weeks after birth and will usually go away on their own after another few weeks. This, too, is caused by the flushing out of mom's hormones from the baby's body.

Hair Loss: If your baby is born with hair, he/she may keep it, or lose it over the next few months. A bald spot may form where the head rubs against surfaces (the back of the head is a common spot). The hair may not grow back in until 6 months of age or later.

If You're Worried, Buy a Doppler..

My path to conception wasn't the usual one. It wasn't an accidental "Ooops!"; it wasn't a planned pregnancy that happened right away. My pregnancy was one fraught with infertility and hormone tests and procedures aimed at making my baby for me. I'll do a whole post (or five hehe) on infertility later, but what those of you who didn't deal with infertility in getting pregnant may not realize is that we don't get to continue down the same path as you once we get pregnant.

We worry. We worry a lot! Because we weren't able to have babies easily or naturally like you were and because for months we saw a Big Fat Negative, we gained a sense of thought that the bottom would always fall out. So while others enjoy their ever growing belly and wait for their morning sickness to end, we "formerly-infertiles" worry that we have had a missed miscarriage, or the baby will have a disability, or that our decrease in symptoms means that something is wrong. It's stupid, honestly, but getting your brain to believe that is something I haven't quite mastered yet. And we envy those who don't live like this, with the constant sense of worry. I'd give anything to "enjoy this pregnancy" as my husband continues to beg me to do.

Due to infertility, we were lucky to get extra ultrasounds in the beginning - while done primarily for medical purposes, I think doctors know we're the kind of women who need extra reassurance that things are going ok. However, once you "graduate" from your fertility specialist, you're a pregnant woman at 11 weeks, just like everyone else. You only get that monthly visit, and you'll probably only get an ultrasound another 2-3 times in your entire pregnancy. For me, this increased the worry. Going 4 weeks without knowing everything is ok is HARD.

So I recently bought a fetal doppler. It was a "cheap" one at only $60 so we were certainly taking a risk when we bought it that it would actually work. It had great reviews though, so for me the risk was worth the payoff. It came in the mail yesterday and I was like a kid at Christmas. I couldn't open the box fast enough or get through the manual quick enough - despite a quick stop to make a cheese quesadilla because I was starving. My husband and I spent what had to be 15 minutes just picking up my own heartbeat. It was a bit frustrating, but we didn't give up. Finally, we tried in just a slightly different spot and there it was! 156 bpm and as strong as ever.

For a girl who worries, this doppler is my salvation. I can't convince myself to stop worrying, but hearing that heartbeat always calms my fears (for at least a week). Now I know that whenever I'm questioning the health of this baby, I can be reminded easily without waiting for my monthly appointment. I can't say how much this feels like a gift from God (or fetaldoppler.net).

If you were previously infertile, did you find yourself worrying more than your fellow pregnant friends? Were you a woman who worried constantly during your pregnancy, who did not deal with previous infertility or a history of miscarriages? If you had other methods for calming your worries, please share them below.

You'll Never Regret It

Apparently this post is going around on Facebook, although I haven't personally seen it. It was shared with me on a site I frequent, and because it's just such a beautiful and honest look at motherhood I had to share it with you. If you're currently emotional due to pregnancy, have a Kleenex handy.

(Author Unknown)

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family." "We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes.

I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her.

That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moments hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her
baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming
children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself.

That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor.

My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks.

I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child.

I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike.

I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time.

I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.

Old Wives Tales - Gender/Sex Prediction

I am currently a little over three months pregnant. At this point the one thing that consumes my mind the most (other than the constant, "is he/she ok still?") is the gender of our baby. My husband and I struggled to get pregnant, so above all things we just want a healthy baby. But as some of you can probably relate to, I'm a planner. I want to know the gender ASAP so that I can buy gender-related clothes and baby items, pick out a scheme for our nursery, and finalize our baby's name. As a way to fill the time until our ultrasound (which should occur between 16 and 20 weeks) I recently googled Old Wives Tales to see what they might say.

The following are some old wives tales I've found (although be warned, variations of each certainly exist so if you've heard of one a bit different it's no surprise):

1. Baby Bump: If you carry high, it's a GIRL; if you carry low, it's a BOY.
2. Heart Rate: If your baby's heart rate is 140 BPM or higher, it's a GIRL; if it's lower than 140 BPM, it's a BOY.
3. Cravings: If you crave sweet foods like ice cream, it's a GIRL; if you crave salty or sour foods, it's a BOY.
4. Chinese Birth Chart: If you visit HERE you can find out what the Chinese would predict the gender of your baby is, based upon how old you are and the month you conceived.
5. Mayan Births: Look at your age and the year you conceived. If both are even number or both are odd numbers, it's a GIRL; if both vary, for instance if you're 29 but conceived in 2012, it's a BOY.
6. Zits: If your acne has increased since pregnancy, it's a GIRL; if your face looks awesome, it's a BOY.
7. Morning Sickness: If you've had bad morning sickness, it's a GIRL; if you haven't had morning sickness, it's a BOY.
8. Drano Test: Pee in a cup and then add a tablespoon of Drano; if it turns green, it's a GIRL; if it turns blue, it's a BOY. Warning: do NOT put the Drano in first or risk burning your girlie parts.
9. Ring on a String Test: If you tie your wedding ring to a string and hang it over your pregnant belly, if it goes back and forth, it's a GIRL; if it goes in a circle, it's a BOY.

I did many of these for myself and got a variety of BOY and GIRL answers, and it's likely you will too. If anything, it's just a fun way to waste time until an ultrasound tells you for sure.

Other gender predictions I've heard of are:

1. The only true way to tell the gender is if your breasts grow a lot, it's a GIRL; and if they don't, it's a BOY.
2. If your placenta/chorionic villis are placed on the left side of the uterus, it's a GIRL; if they are on the right side, it's a BOY.

What gender prediction methods have you heard of or tried? Were they true for you?

Welcome!

This blog is written by four mamas, for mamas - hence the name. As four friends, we found that the best source of education on pregnancy, infants, or kids was the kind you got from other moms who'd already gone through the same thing. Since our conversations continue to be so helpful to us as parents (or soon-to-be parents) we figured that we'd share our stories with you too and continue that helpful trend. Likewise, we hope that your comments or shared stories on our posts will be educational to us as well.

To let you know more about who we are as writers, here's a quick summary. We are all at different stages of motherhood. One of us has two kids, another has an infant girl, and two of us are pregnant. Two of us dealt with infertility or taking a long time to get pregnant and the other two got knocked up right away. We come from a variety of backgrounds and personal preferences - using midwives and hypnobirthing to OBGYN's and epidurals. Finally, we're all really invested in this blog and you!

We look forward to sharing our stories and advice with you on a regular basis. We'll tackle issues like potty training and infant feedings to fertility and trying to conceive. We hope you enjoy reading them just as much as we enjoy writing them!

~ Four Mamas